Black heart of gold!

I'm always saying this to girls in particular that I try and do good deeds to right some of the bad things I've done... and they'll say to me... "you crazy!" or something like that.. but I'm dead serious though! I mean I'm sometimes suprised that God continues to watch over me..I know I'm a good person but I just do things... Anyways it's a toss up whether I'll get my full pay this week. I looked at my statement and it's only $250. So those diamonds might have to wait.

I was sitting and thinking heavy and puerto rican chick called me to shoot the shit. We talked for a hot minute about her trip to puerto rico and my trip to barbados it felt good, it was almost like a high. I started to tell her how I was feeling down and shit and she was like you should come over here I can make you feel better....etc *dash of cold water*
I don't really want to tell her you know I'm not tryna fuck with you like that too much right now and I probably won't cause as much as I hate being in the waiting room myself, I'd rather keep her there, cause I've heard pregnant girls have that pure brita water filter juice! Plus I'm stuck in a girls waiting room my damn self. I gotta call Jen Bear and just talk to her cause I'm feeling down and my resistence is low and I know her cynical realism and vicious criticism will be like a slap in the face.

Anyways on the way home I passed by the humane society, and I thought since I love dogs and cats more than I do people, if anything could quiet my soul and put some good points on the board for me it's gotta be volunteer work or prayer. I've never been the praying type so volunteer work it is. I figure instead of wasting time and energy playing these fuckity fuck fuck games with these girls I minds well do some good. I filled out the application and talked to this chick there and I should hear something from them pretty soon.


THE 0NE THEY AiNT USED T0. said...

Good luck with that.
i can relate for the "doing bad shit antd trying to compensate" thing...

by the way, im done with my mind being in mars, i have a new blog... head in the clouds...



The Black Russian said...

"try and do good deeds to right some of the bad things I've done".. i totally agree with that were not perfect and we just try were only people...good for you on volunteering doing something good taking focus off of the bs lol...

Dallas Black said...

Good luck with the dog thing man...but eh it may take a PR to lift your spirits...Puerto Rico!

But Kudo's to you for seeing through the obvious...requires growth.


Judy D. said...

WAIT? is she pregnant with some other dudes seed or spawn, as u say AND STILL THROWING THE PUSSY?

OH hell 2 the no

Judy D. said...

feel better love...
today i was on the same low 2


Stew said...

good luck on the community service. you will be fulfilled by it, i promise.

and the thing you heard about pregnant chicks is true

Taryn "Skinny Genes" B. said...

good deeds arent enough. Its the heart behind the good deeds.

Theirs a lot of moral, good deed people who never murdered, stole, or cheated and theyre still going to hell...MWUAHAHAHAHA

Han said...

lol at taryn.

um.... i was confused by your analogies for a second and i had to read over it 2x. but er... yea.... i'm still confused about the preggos and pure brita water?

Andre said...

I think everybody can relate...it's hella hard to do the right thing...

@Black Ruskie
Oh my focus is still on that bullshit please believe, but hopefully this volunteer work can take my mind off it for a lil bit you know?

@Black Dallas
All it is with her is she just wants to fuck or whatever and right about now my pool of money woes overshadow my lurst, and hopefully I'm growing as a person cause I'm still makin' young bo mistakes sometimes..

Hopefully I will? But...
Come on now, I mean it's not like she's 9 months or something! Granted I haven't seen her since I've been back, but she was already slim so I doubt she ballooned up it's only been like 2 months. I honestly think there's nothing wrong with it. I mean she still has womanly needs, should she just stop having sex till she drops?

If I'm not fulfilled by it, I'm blaming it on you. I hope it is true, a few of my homeboys have been with girls who are pregnant and they said it is the business!

So you're saying I'm gonna burn in hell!?! Lol
Nah I mean my intentions are always good, but that's the path to hell right there isn't it? Better yet I do what's right when the situation is in clear black and white, but throw in another hue and I start rationalizing this and that.

@Han solo
I've been told that when girls are pregnant they get super super wet during sex, I'm talkin put a towel down wet. Some people call it "aquafina" I call it pure brita water filter juice just cause it makes me chuckle and I'm a silly person!

Judy D. said...

ugh yea... lol... i think that shyt is disrespectful to her seed, to you, and her man... excuse me if i am living in the old world... smh... i think yr asking for drama down the line. i know its hard for a lot of ppl to look down the line

Andre said...

wrong, wrong, and wrong JD, she knows what she is doing, I mean I don't really see anything bad coming out of this down the line. I think it's that she wants intimacy or whatever cause I can tell if I woulda been like really into the convo we were having, we woulda talked for a hot minute about everything and nothing at all. The best way her young mind sees to get it(intimacy) is through sex. and in a way, I'm kinda the same way. I want a relationship/intimacy with JP but while she's playing hard to get I don't know what to do!

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