Don't be 'haitian' on me

It's kinda sad that it takes a natural disaster to spread light on certain places and their plights, but I'm not on any high horse though...

TK at Wish

Late as always I got to the store and that place was packed wall to wall with hipsters in the skinniest of jeans in the wildest of colors. So like any normal person I just stood in line not knowing what the line is for or leading to... So from just talking to people I found out that there was only like 46 pairs and when I got there, there was like 6 left. So I still said 'fuck it' and waited it out. After about 15 minutes in line I'm up front right behind this dude and his girl. So I look at the stash of shoes and I see...Two pairs of 4's, a 11.5 and a 12 (my size) So I'm like hell yeah cause I see the dude in front of me look kind of excited and shit. So I ask him...

Me: What size you wear? *looks down at his feet*

I wear a 12.

Me: ...........

Me: *unctous grin on face* Well you should get the 11.5's and I'll just get the 12's.

*no hesitation* Ok

Me: For reals?!?

Yeah

Me: You're alright! I'm gonna dance at your wedding!

So after a FAA screening type process I got my shoes and proceeded to the 'complimentary vodka bar' which in principle is ran off tips but you know how that goes.... So I'm walking around this store buzzing off 'complimentary' vodka and pineapples and go and check out the 'lab of shoes' downstairs and see... Coming upstairs I see Terry Kennedy and just ask him for a picture on some non groupie ass dude type shit.... So with my buzz on and my kicks in tow I headed out of there and into lil five points a very happy man.

Andre

Whem I was in Atlantic City I went to Trump's casino and he's got this high end promenade of stores like a Louis store, Gucci store and an Andre store.

I should start dressing myself!

I remember I came across these jeans while I was looking for God knows what, so I blogged about them and everyone shared my WTF-ness supposedly.... well not everyone.

The funny thing is I remember seeing some guy with these on at the Blend fashion party and I thought that he may of just gotten his "taryn" on and got freaky with that sewing machine... no dice. I was kind of hurt to find out my surrogate brand shmack (that I have been flucking with since a little after it's inception) came out with these. Looking at them though, they don't look THAT bad, I'd wear 'em though. Just don't tell anybody!

Excuse Me

I used to love the cutting nihilistic humor of this show...I was but a gentle impressionable teen dying to find my identity and something I could relate to.
This show gave me that.
Her sarcasm was so biting and unemotional, and she just seemed above the people around her.

I loved how they'd always play the hottest songs of the moment right before the commercial break and at the end of the show they'd do alter egos of the characters and shit...

Fashion Club...



I still to this day model most of my dry wit and humor after the show... for example my conversation with a very pretty light skin girl exchanging condensed life stories.


Very pretty light skinned girl: So you lived in england, how comes you don't speak english?

Me: ......You mean like what I'm speaking now...

VPLSG: *smiles the smile that puts the fannies in the seats* shut up, you know what I mean...

Me:.......

I wanted to find a girl just like Daria (a lil hotter though) in high school. I kinda did in Jen Bear... but she's a BFF so does that count?

SUPERFERTILE

SUPERFERTILE = Kali Arulpragasam, an accomplished jewelery designer out of london.

If I ever sell a beat for a couple stacks I'm definitely gonna get a senegalese or bajan necklace made with something hell sick on it!

check her out it's pretty nasty!

Stanks for the memories

I believe I can live like there is no tomorrow because I had the foresight to invest in comic books... 5 out of 10 analysts say after gold and oil, comic books are the biggest investment!


I used to be so creative when I was younger before I let that weed and coochie turn me out. I used to sit in class all day making these insect like sculptures out of paper clips. All my pockets were cut up from keeping them in my pocket and I used to raid teachers desks for boxes of paper clips. Who knows, if I would've stuck with it, I could've had an exhibit at a NY museum, or better yet, been blogged about by Hypebeast!



During my "jungle Fever" phase, my girl Felicia got me into Slipknot real heavy! I made these for us for halloween, it took a few bic pens to really get the drippy effect. I'm glad I'm a packrat, or she might have these right now!





Jen Bear @ the Pink Pony 2



Playboy J @ Pink Pony 2, one of my few light skinned HB's.



This man jumped clean over the hood of a fuckin volvo.

Pic Tails 3 1/3

Me and Big Sis went winehousing the night before I left to go to Tennesee with Jen bear... So Jen was blowing my phone up on her way to get me hella early (10am) so I was still feeling the effects of last night on the drive up there. It got kinda redneckish on the way there (somebody asked me "What yer say there fella?", the fuck do you reply to that?) but the drive wasn't that bad.

We get there and go to the Oconee river we're gonna be rafting and it looked pretty swheat. When we got in the raft we had this young ass instructor with no personality, he pulled us three dudes aside and said...
"We don't normally let woman get in the front, so I'm gonna need y'all to compensate for their weakness, alright guys?"

White water rafting wasn't as intense as I thought it would be, but it was fun as hell!
Later that night at the campsite the instructors comment slipped and Jen and Kat were 500 about that shit for reals! They were ready to call him and cuss him out.
We built a bitchin fire, made smores, played cards and eat subway and just really roughed it.


The next day we went to this family owned restaurant were the menu said
"Although out religous beliefs do not allow us to eat or handle pork because it is an unclean filthy animal, we readily make it availiable to our customers"
WTF
I asked the blue eyed waitress what she did for fun in this lil' shit hole town, and she was like
"Rafting the river"


All in all pretty cool trip!

Live from Barbados

I got in yesterday...and after being held at the airport by immagration I see my uncle and it's all scraight. Drivin around these bajans drive crazy as hell and I don't just mean cause their left hand drive, I mean passing on blind hills and turns. I'm kind scared to get behind the wheel but I will though...I'm walkin around here in flip flops, a cowboy straw hat and a wifebeater lookin like a whatever and I love it! It's so beautiful here, words really can't explain...I mean I kinda freaked on the plane landing, I was lookin out the window and I'm like this is a fuckin island! Where I'm staying (st. phillips is less touristy and just perfect for chilaxin like I wanna... Since I've been here I went to the coast near my uncle's house and swam and just took it all in and worked on my tan, ate some ackee's, eat flying fish and told my uncle about the whole false baby / worst 4 months of my life situation... I mean it was good just dialouging with him about life in general and these women out here.. He told me something thats true as hell and I hope I never forget it...What else is crazy is that my uncle is about 60 years old and he's still pullin 'em, young ones (early 30's) at that!

The only thing that would make this better is female compainionship and I can think of like 3 girls I'd like to be here with but oh well right? anyways probably when I get back to Ga I'll have the pics for y'all!

So yeah...

edit @ 23:27

my uncle found an adaptor for my digi so here's a lil something...


My unc's neighgbor's daughter who just finished reading my erotic short story...she asked me what a prince albert was and I didn't whip out like I should've. I just told her...


The coast where I swim and work on my tan..that reef/break I actually climbed on. yay me! Next time I go I'm gonna find a place to jump off where I won't kill myself..


Ackee's sweet nectar fruits of the Gods!

Captain senor mouse

Mom:Andre... there's someone here to see you
who?
Mom:Come and see
Rawr!

Instead of enjoying perculater and wu-tang videos on youtube I'm interupted with some mysterious bullshit!
So I go out and I'm ready to jut say KTHXBI to somebodies unannouced ass, till I see a cute ass lil' chocolate chick with a bob that actually looks good...
then my moms all like "this is Shay, she's been trying to meet you everytime you came here but you'd always miss each other...she's about your age I think. Yeah, her aunt stays across the street. She worked at the bank of america in krogers right there. You might've seen her there, she's a manager of another one in snellville now. She moved out to snellville recently and she doesn't really know anyone.

I swear if I was lightskinned I'd be turning red! I mean I hate akward situations to begin with and here my mom is hooking me up like I'm a prepubescent shy boy and adlibbin everything me and chick says like she's jeezy or something. I couldn't come sideways at her like I wanted cause of mom dukes is just watching me, so I just asked some general knowledge questions; she's jamaican, 25 has her masters in human resources and she wants to be a diplomat when she grows up.

So to leave this circus of akwardivity, I make a store run. It's rainin hella bad so I get a umbrella and walk chick to her car and as she gets in she's like "you can get my number from your mom (pause) if you want."

On a completely not that different note "Puerto rican chick'' calls me and tells me how great puerto rico is, how next time I've gotta come with, and how when I get back she'll be back a week later blah blah blah... I'm sitting there talking to her and I know that when she gets back she could be my easy anytime clothing optional girl. Then I remember she's pregnant with another man's spawn... plus there's JP, I went out with before I left and "she didn't make me miserable, or anxious, or ill at ease. You know, it sounds boring, but it wasn't. It wasn't spectacular either. It was just good. But really good."
So yeah...

A lil 2L;2R but there's pics!

Last weekend was great! Me and my dog nick went to a cool spot called 'stats' downtown, it wasn't what I really had in mind cause I was "dressed up" and wanted to dance-dance. But we just kicked it like gentleman thugs and had a good time.

I get back to the house at like midnight and I'm still kinda on Va time where I'm like "oh no! I gotta rush to the club, I've only got a hour and a half of party time!" so decide to go to primetime cause it's right around the corner and if I do get winehoused it's a short drive back. So I pull up and am like dwaaamn, cause the normal people line to get in is still thick as fuck. So I avoid it and hit the special people line and walk scraight in...

It was just like it always is, hooder than a lil bit. And I'm dressed for downtown, so all kinda looks are bouncing off of my dolce's...
And the only two white girls in the whole club were in a cage, dancing like their lives depended on it.


So my big sis gets in and we spend all day in lil' 5...



eating indian food, this store that's shittin on Commonwealth called Wish with a secret underground shoe chamber;



Junkman's daughter, criminal records where I finally bought that J*davey. The world's best thrift store where I bought a suede jacket with the elbow pads and I gotta go back for a leather members only jacket that fits me niiiice.


Headin back to the house I get a txt from a friend of mine from middle school and high school "Danielle" I ran into earlier that week on my way to get my headchopped and we txt and she's like this chick from school is havin a birthday party in underground atlanta.

So me and sis fall in there and it's niiice, so I proceed to consume and I find out "sis" is a dancing machine for real for reals!

Sis and her Z PHI B's (no skee wee here)


Then I see danielle and she looked like a plate of white chocolate macadamia cookies,

I mean she looked real good, cause I remember in school she was always tall, yellow and slim, but now she's tall, yellow and thick and it's a real good look on her.

We rap a tad, and shes like "I'm a AKA and aspire to be a judge blah blah blah" real cool convo though. The drive back home was hell,we got in at like 4:30 and I didn't feel any of the screwdrivers till I sat down in the car...

Then Jen Bear came through hella early waking me up at like 11 to go to Tennesee for white water rafting!

Guerdon

"something that one has earned or gained"

Teacher beating student ass!!!

Man kids these days boy I swear... I really didn't know what I wanted to be when I grew up for most of my life... But right before I started going to college I decided on being a history teacher, 1.Because I'm good at teaching people shit and 2. Because history never changes..lol Anyway after seeing this shit, as you y'all are my witness, I'd fuck a kid up!!! I remember I was at Columbia high school in Decatur for summer school and this was about the summer before 11th grade. Anyway this dude I think his name was like Javaris or something was listening to a cd player in class and the teacher took it from him and told him to "He might get it back after class!" and the dude's friend was laughing at him and sayin the teacher tried his ass up.. So javaris stands up, gets in teacher's face and tells him to give him his fucking cd player back and mushed the shit outta the teacher. I was just like damn, then the SRO the size of green mile came and snatched his young ass up.. But seeing this video I would've been crying in that classroom...

Check it out here
Teacher and student fight!

The teacher, listed as Carolyn Jones, said she overheard the student saying she was going to pull Jones’ wig off. The 53-year-old said she took the wig off herself and told the student that she would have to.....

Afram Fest Day 1

The afram festival was real cool... my homegirl had told me it was either this weekend or next month so lucky for me I asked somebody who knew somethin about somethin and found out what was up... Anyway the African American festival is supposedly like a celebration of the black culture through events sponsered by different black owned business' and whatnot. But in my experiences in Atlanta and in Virginia, the Afram fest is nothin but a place to go to fresh as hell and get on girls, and the dudes who can't get girls, they just come to start fights and shit... But I went and like a dummy bought a one day bracelet for $10 instead of the weekend for $20, because a puerto rican chick wants to go see Kiesha Cole when she supposedly comes on Monday... but me and my dog Lloyd were in there just chillin, walkin around and meting girls or whatever, and even though I wasn't on it like I should've been I still had a good time.. So at about 6 my dog "Bapman" calls me and is like he's on his way, so after playin phone tag we meet up and this dude is drunk as a dog... hollerin at ANY girl. So we meet up with my other partners he came with "squeek" and "dig" and we just straight clown... Ray J performed some cat in the hat, fake ass "The Dream" type song called "hips" or "lips" then One Chance came out and I fuck with there song "Look at her" with Fabo and they were bout scraight.. Then while Lloyd was performing we were walkin the outskirts tryna find a food place, when all I see is like a mob of people running towards our direction and this skinny half-cast chick just falls and scrapes the shit out of her knees, and the mob is still just stampeding past us, I don't hear shots but still I'm ready to move... I ask this girl what was going on and she was like "I don't know I saw everybody runnin' so I started runnin' too!" LOL

The night before

I left my apartment at about 2:45 cause the airport is like 5 minutes away or whatever so I go to auto check in and it's like you're too late to check in you gotta get the next flight at like 5:45... fluck all that so I talked to the kiosk lady and everything was irie... so I board and sit next to a drummer who seemed pretty cool, he saw I was reading "I hope they serve beer in hell" by Tucker Max (one of the major influences behind my blog because even though my shenanigans aren't nearly as drunken as his, they still are pretty fluckin sweet). So I touch down and almost break my sidekick tryna talk to the fuckin' cab dispatch lady "I'm sorry sir there must be a bad connection." BITCH I'VE GOT FULL BARS AND T-MOBILE, THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS A BAD CONNECTION! Is what I wanted to yell to her, I mean my last name is four letter, granted it's not a common American name like Smith or whatever but damn...
So I cab it to the hotel which is actually in North Virginia, and it's a real nice Marriott out in the sticks. So I go up to my room which is on the 14th (13th) floor and it is plushed out for reals, I mean I stayed at the Swisotel in Atlanta before and this place is shittin on that. I mean there's a balcony if I'm feelin suicidal with a great view of trees and more trees..jacuzzi tub, a 30" flat screen, super high thread egyptian cotton and down comforters. Since I've been in Va, before I had a place, when it came to hooking up, my choices were either A. Get a hotel room B. Backseat action, even though it is proven to be bad luck to your car. C. Go to a slaughterhouse, and use a friends bed like it's yours. Or the rare D. Go back to her place. So going from the always classy $55 a night Navy Lodge or HoJo to this is a welcome change.
I'm kicking myself for reals though, because I just made a succesful purchase of a network adaptor for my X-Box off craigslist, I wanted to geek out on X Box live with my down time during the night. So I called before I left and asked about wireless internet, and the front desk was like ''No, we just have wired." So I get here and I see blatently. Wifi.... so now I'm bored out of my mind, thankfully I've got like a $50 dollar room credit on the Marrow Center so I'm gonna go down to the bar, drink Mojitos and walk around in my robe.

My Thrashin's

I got my Thrashin' dunks and they look even sweeter in person, I've noticed that after salivating over upcoming dunks, they always look different in person, not bad different but just different. These Thrashins are sadly going to be my last pair of dunks, I mean after gettin' emails from Solebrother, I zoom over there and pick up shoes, and now I've got like all these hot shoes and don't really wear them all that much. Plus I really wanna stack that cheese for when I (knock on wood) go to home to Stone Mountain next month.

J* Davey baby

Jack Davey or J*Davey is that hot fish grease for reals! Now I love all types of music, I mean except really for a lot of new rock and emo stuff, and of course country. I just can't get into a lot of new stuff too much but if catches my ear I'll listen. My roomate is obsessed with cleanliness so like if company was over on a friday night, you better believe saturday morning it's time to clean. So everytime we cleaned he'd put on this girl J*Davey and the more and more I heard it, the more and more I liked it until I finally started humming it and wanted to hear more of that shit. J*Davey is actually two people, a singer and a producer. The producer is just some dude named Brooke and his beats are pretty freaky, but Jack Davey, she's a really pretty modelesque chick with a mohawk, and a sexy throaty playful voice, kinda like a Fiona Apple with a Erykah Badu swagger about herself. So check her out on Imeem or Limewire, the only bad thing is she's unsigned and a lot of her stuff is hard to find, like she might drop an EP and if you don't get it, you're assed out. Take a listen to "This One" "Relax" "Mr. Mister" "Might As Well" and she remixed Frank Zappa's "Dirty Love" and it is crushin.
oh yeah she's got a pretty sweet blog too.

missjackdavey.com