A day in the life of 23 years

1st. "Omari" came out on saturday for winehousing and wine up. She is bad. I mean like cocaine bad, and it felt damn good to walk in the club with her and just see faces rearrange, my homeboy Lloyd and his peoples nods of approval. BUT she's talkin that boyfriend jazz one minute (you should meet him, he's really cool) and the next she's all about me(leg up, her lil' tap of booty in hand and me "wine pon dem gal" on the dance floor). I mean if I was a man of scruples and didn't have a "black heart of gold"

1 1/4. But I also think while I was walking and talking with her that... "Damn this girl is fuckin sexy"but I can do better. I can have a chick that looks gooder than or equal to, and she could be all mines" Why must I always want the maximum

1 1/2. I wore a cardigan in the club. Even though it was hot as fuck, I just choose my songs/girls to dance with wisely. I don't wanna be in there with a ph-olo shirt like every other dude. Like "arychtexas" has told me... "Us dark skinned dudes can't just be in there looking mediocre, we gotta go the extra mile!"

3. Why the fuck can't I comment like crazy from my Sidee? What the hell is really going on here.. Errytime I try and submit the comment, it's like the page just reloads

4. Friday nights in Va are so hit or miss! and last friday was certainly a miss... Didn't really get to crazy I just did some short-short long all night...very nice!

7. Soul Men is a hilarious! I normally don't get down with movies like that, and went in with low expectations, but as soon as I walked in and heard Sam J. saying "muthafucka" and start yellin... I lost it. I went and saw it with "Toya" the girl who masks promiscuity in the guise of a relationship... .

11. Because said friday was a miss I'm back at her place and we're in her room all touchy feely (Sowwy J*Did your sound practical "sisterly" legal advice is no match for the lurst on a friday night)and it's about to go down. She kinda stops and looks at me and is like...

"so are you gonna be my man?"

*I had a JD/ Zack Morris, stop time moment/dream sequence where I got out of bed and paced around with a woody and am like "Why the fuck would she ask me this NOW?!!?" then I climbed back next to her and I said*

Me: It sure looks like it.. giggiddy giggiddy goo

*face slap*

Back to reality...

Me: It ain't even a question (which is not even an answer)

12. I officially am endorsing Trojan Climax Control condoms alongside the longtime sponsor of my lurst filled nights, Trident Tropical Splash (the orange pack). The last girl I jumped with, it ended with me putting my clothes on in the deafening silence of an unsatisfied woman without a chance to redeem myself in round 2 (because that first one was a wash the second was gonna be the killa). Anyways as soon as put it on and I got into it, I knew she was in trouble, I felt like Ricky Bobby "goin fast" again. Slayage... But the million dollar ? is will I get dependent on these condoms?

13. A quenched lurst at night trumps an akward morning.

15. I was walking to my car from the mall and was saying "uggggnnnhh" as in like the song"ungggggnhh me so horny". For some reason it was just cracking my shit up. (I'm 23 I gotta leave that childish shit behind right?) So I'm walking and saying "uggggggnnnnhhh" and just laughing like a fool... till I hear keys jangling not too far behind me... I turned to look at her but for some reason she avoided eye contact! So I tried to turn my laughing into a cough but from how far we were from the exit, I knew she had been following me for the whole entire time, and who knows what she was thinking.

16. Waffle house isn't just good food. It's good food for the soul.

18. I've got a severely nasty mean spirit sometimes...I mean in situations were a kind word would make things smooth over, I say fuck that and "tell the person about themselves / ridicule to make myself feel better. My homegirls 1 semester of psych, tell her I only do it because it was done to me, and with the roles reversed I don't know how to act!

18.5 That was told to me by a girl who's supposed to be celibate (I believe she is she's been around the block and she is pretty much the block, but she's still keut though) but met some dude at the bar and took him home and let him titty fuck her. She called me and told me that, I wanted to laugh in her face and cuss her out so bad! So don't try to tell me nothing you fucking hypocrite!

19. I went to see a girl from New York and I looove her accent. She's from strong island and talks like R to the E-Z. She doesn't just say "wow" she drags it and says "whooooooow". She told me I was packin' and I said "where am I going?"

21. She looks so cute and innocent but she's getting baaaaaadI hung out with a two good friends turned bloggers "arych" and his wife and daughters and "tharula". We watched "sex and the city" which IMHO is a terrible movie, I mean I couldn't even really enjoy the movie past that one homely girls insanely long neck, the one who looks like...anyways I knew how it was gonna end as soon as she told her husband that bullshit.

22. The more and more I listen to Santogold the more and more I like her voice! I wish I had GF who talked like santogold... I'd stay up late with her and wake up early to breakfasts of mango chutney on Thomas' English Muffins!

23. Feels like this is gonna be a great age for me y'alls!!!


queenbee said...

1. i guess u did my bday wish for u --lurstful winehousin ....holllaaaa!
2. so wats gives with jump off chick? u gonna take it back..jus b like 'devil made me do it, or better yet 'lurst made me do it'...charge it to da game....im goin straight to hell with gasoline draws...ill save u a seat lol

3. santagold is da business folks stay sleepin on her

Jaded said...

HAHAHAHAH!! This is the best post ever:

Reason's why Andre's the funniest person I don't know IRL
(1) He fractionizes his count downs. As in 1 1/2. 18.5 ect. etc.
(2) He goes to clubs in cardigans.
(3) He doesn't follow my advice
(4) He doesn't realize that waffle house is completely and utterly disgusting
(5) He seems to be really good at attracting sexually adventurous women
(6)He has perfected the art of not answering a question at the ripe old age of 23
There are more but I'll leave it at that. lmao.

Judy D. said...

please dont tell me u messing with the pregnant girl... lol

i need to get up on santogold... i trust yr taste...

happy belated... :)

be good... ;)

Dallas Black said...

Ha your funny dude...

Man, I like those lambskin condoms..my brother left one and i ganked it from his house..best ever. But then hit Walgreens and found out they like 8 bucks each...damn, gotta save that for wifey.

mocha chick is def hot mane..

Dallas Black

A.M. said...

WTF is up with my Blackberry. I so posted here from it. Anyway, like I was trying to say before...she is okay...the Omari gurl. Pretty hair but she seems botoxed out lol

Glad ur enjoying life though :)

kmx. said...

"uggggnnnhh" - lmfao! Started laughin soon as I read that because that's some dumb sht I would do...
Aha...& That girl is pretty, but her nose bothers me a little...still attractive nontheless!!


Video Vix[o]n said...

-cardigans are the shit. i'm steppin up my game with those. arychtexas dont like man.

-LMAO at the Scrubs moment. JD's daydreams be OD sometimes.

-waffle house are the shit. IHOP fo lyfe (well at least the clean ones).

-haven't heard Santagold much, but i'll look her up.

23 is a cool age. I'm still 20, but that'll be another post.

Mr.Socialight said...

Word. Chick is definitely dope.

thanks for coming through the blog.

happy belated.

tight blog.

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