20081117

But beyonce says to do it!


It's crazy the people you meet in bars... "omari" a fellow scorpio had her birthday on the 12th, so of course she wanted to go out on Friday!
We went to Guadalajara's which I haven't been back to since going there with "Jazzy Girl" on Cinco de Mayo *shudder* anyways, she met these two chicks (the other chick would always disappear and then reappear outta nowhere) and this one dude while waiting for me to get there.

They were cool as shit and right off the back I told this chick she looked like Meadow Soprano...
Then things got kinda weird, they took us to this bar in this hotel their friend 'tended at and told me and "omari" like "We can go here and drink free yada yadda..." So we get to the bar and say our what's up and get ready to order and "omari" is like..


"can I get a skyy screwdriver"

Bartender tom : ugggh *visibly disgusted by her choice of vodka* We don't carry skyy, we have absolut, I could make you something with a quality vodka.
(in my mind I was like WTF!!! I'd use both of those to clean wounds and bomb establishments in riots...they're both shitty vodkas, fuck are you really saying man!)


So after he got over his initial rudeness, he turned out to be a pretty cool, though catty as a mufucka but cool nonetheless, he had us gone off these shots he was makin and this magical iced tea liquor called "firefly" which I'm strongly thinking about endorsing in my reality show airing on Oxygen in the near future.

So our belly's are full of liquor and bartend tommy puts a black leather check binder in front of us....


???

Now I'm not a cheap guy and I have no prob paying for my shit, cause I damn sure was drinking it, but y'all were kicking it to me like shits on the house. So I peep the bill and it says...
$6.25

For five people drinking copious amounts of alcohol the charge was only $6.25... I can get jiggy with that shit, so I threw in $6 and so did pretty much errbody else. So I see dude open up the lil book and make a face like "oh is that all...."


After that we ditched them in this tavern in downtown va beach, went to Ihop and dissected that rude bartender for being a ungrateful douche, and skipped outta Ihop before our food came, saw a cool statue...

talked about her plans for "bronze-ing" her hair ala J.Lo...
Just enjoying being young and being alive/winehoused!

Saturday was chill, I spent it morningtime playing Gears of War 2 over the "McCain 2012 wireless network" which is how we connect our sexbox 360's from my shop to my buddy from rhode island's shop...No wires... very nice!

Went to Arychtexas's house and got treated to a belated/heartfelt dinner of delicious chinese cuisine over talks of gays right to marriage, and the morality of abortion.


Was supposed to meet "omari" at my official downtown norfolk spot, entourage. But she stayed in the popular clear bar Scotty Quiks...So I went out with Lloyd and the club was full of square ass dudes, so we shut it down...

Highlights include, but are not limited to...

*dancing with a this one chick for about 5 solid reggae songs, I'm talking dick "harder than termite teeth", passa passa grinding , booty grippin, dick grabbing, face to face "dancing"... so I shoot for the number chick is like "I'm married" LMAO

* Pulled a white chick who's an alleged music producer of some sort and during the "club courtship" I asked her to dance. This chick proceeds to combine mitsubishi commercial girl, elaine benice's "little kicks" dance, Cameron Diaz's charlie's angels "booty dance" and the official white girl "hands on the knees "teabag" /drop it down low- then bring it back up" all into a smorgasbord of akward terrible, terribleness. Then she started waving her arms and doing that hold your hands by your head and snap your fingers then like snake your head and neck (hard to describe but y'all know what I'm talking about!) Black girls are looking at me like "look at this Seal/Charles from madea ass nigga here!" dudes are giving me "commiserating looks" that say "You gotta do what you gotta do!" but I'm winehoused and slighty lursty so I just pull her to me and we do my dance...


* like the title says I think Beyonce only wants the girls to "pat their own weaves" Apparently it's frowned upon when a guy does it! I'm dancing with this light skin chick with a head full of "cherokee/apache/spanish heritage" and following Bey's words: Cooling off, watching her walk, touching our heels/toes. Then I pat her weave and chick spazzes thee fuck out! Kinda assholeish..but still LMFAO

16 comments:

MR style said...

nice blog and some cute people ::) i love it

Lina said...

Now even though I have yet to see any woman darker than me on this page, I must say that you, my dear Andre, have excellent taste in choosing/picking beautiful women. Glad the weekend was cool.

hb said...

lmfao! he patted her weave!? HAHAHA! embarrassed.

hmmm... after reading lina's comment... do you talk to black girls? i hope you aren't one of those guys that have been scarred by one and was like "yo man, eff this! i ain't ever messing with another black girl!"
yea... my former bff had said that in a joking but not really joking kind of way... yea...

Andre's from his sidekick! said...

@styles
The girls yeah...the guys..not so much.

@linas and hb's
You know most dark gals don't go for dark skinned boys. I mean y'all should know I don't discriminate, I ejaculate and it seems like self hate/black woman bitterness syndrome aside, I find myself attracted to the more exotic looking woman like coolies, east indians and hispanic women but I would love to have a chocolate woman and it just doesn't seem like that's ever going to happen. But I won't give up hope or back down.

Kandi Black said...

LMFAO @ you patting the chick's weave for her...Andre, you really are to much...we need to kick it, on the real...lol

Dope Fiend said...

im am highly in nonunderstandment as to how you are not on my blogroll!


LOL this post made me crack the fuck up! hurt my back n shit!


excuse me whilst i proceed to stalk you.

xoxo

Miss Toya said...

LOL @ u patting her weave! WOW! ha

A.M. said...

ANDREEEEEEE NOOO u were not allowed to pat her weave LOL now thats hella funny. & 6 dollars for drinks? Woop woop.

Charles said...

Yooo...how's that Gears of War? I'm tempted, but I dunno. McCain 2012 wireless network??? too damn funny...

-Charles

PhlyyGirl said...

Yooooo, how you'd get the comment thingy to start working on your sidekick?!?!
Tell me your secrets sensei!!!

Umm, so if you were "patting her weave" did you do the "uh oh, uh oh, uh oh, oh no noo" too? LOL.

And you shouldn't listen to everything B says. Clearly she's crazy. I mean she thinks her name is Sasha or some shit nowadays.... Just saying...

queenbee said...

lol @ pattin her damn weave omg yous a fool cuz....

did beyonce or sasha fiierce tell u to do that? it makes a difference ya knw?

THE CEREBRAL BEAST said...

Your pictures really make your posts come to life, big ups on those. I've ran across people like that bartender, these "connections" end up wanting so much in return for their favor and it NO LONGER becomes a "connection". As far as Gears of War 2, my girl and I had put a deposit on the damn game like 2 months before it was released and have yet to go pick up the copy. Go figure.

kmx. said...

Lmfao at pattin La Weave: Only You!...lol I'll be laughing at that for the next few dayss...& "I'm married" lol, zayummmm. & That rudefck of a bartender needed to get his panties out of a bunch, I would have loved to spit some slick sht his way!!

Haha, loved this post. Keep it comin!! =]

Muze said...

ok, LMFAO at this post.

i need you to be on my blog roll. lol. immediately.

first, you patted her weave?? lmao!

second, lmao @ This chick proceeds to combine mitsubishi commercial girl, elaine benice's "little kicks" dance, Cameron Diaz's charlie's angels "booty dance" and the official white girl "hands on the knees "teabag" /drop it down low- then bring it back up" all into a smorgasbord of akward terrible, terribleness

i'm done. lol.


hope all is well. thanks for the laugh.

Video Vix[o]n said...

skyy screwdriver, really? like really? lol.

"...the official white girl "hands on the knees "teabag" /drop it down low- then bring it back up" all into a smorgasbord of akward terrible, terribleness."
-see that shit in the bars all the time. goodness, what do you do with that? i personally inch away slowly, while performing the head nod-two step move.

yeah girls dont like you patting their weave stuff. i'd think it'd be doing a favor.

T. Michelle Theus said...

LOL @ the girl you were dancing with! I was already lmao at her embodying the mitsubishi commercial girl but then she added all of that other stuff! LOL Was she serious????

And I can't believe you patted that girl's weave! lol Personally, I don't think I would've been mad though I would've laughed =p

Related Posts with Thumbnails
 
visitor web stats