Andre has a little boy haircut

I'm on the ship walking with my boy to get a haircut, so I walk in and one barber is like
"You getting a cut?"
My whole plan was to pull in on friday, rush and get a cut to go out that night and shit. So I say yeah, thinking it's free on the ship to just get my hair cut down to bring out the waves and then get a professional line up tomorrow really making me "the prince of tides" and they can't fuck a simple cut down can they?

I sit down and after a couple passes of the clippers I'm just like damn...I mean this dude is like digging into my hair with the clippers, like he's scooping my waves out so I'm just sitting there trying not to freak out until he spins me around and puts his hand on my shoulder to say...
"My bad"
*hands me a mirror*
Me: *looks in mirror and feels like Castor Troy in 'Face Off'*
I messed up a bit in your head cause I went against the grain...
I don't really know how to cut waves.....they're hard for me
Me: *glares in mirror* So you just let me sit down and practice on my head?

If y'all could've seen how my hair felt, I felt like 'Ye felt. The biggest patch was on the top corner of my head and it went all the way to the back of my head with sporadic patches here and there. What made it even worse was that my dog is right across from me with a good haircut laughing, his barber can't cut his hair cause he's shaking from not trying to laugh, mufuckas waiting to get cuts are laughing and my "barber/butcher" has got some shit eating grin on his face.

"I can fix it but I'll have to go against the grain and take you down to a 1 (which is like...a bal head almost)"

So I'm sitting there looking in the mirror at the archipelago this mufucka cut in my head and I say just leave it cause I don't want a almost bald head (I've got a dip in my head that I hide well with my waves, plus short-short hair doesn't suit me IMO) and he tells me "I can't let you leave like that"

Me: Nah just finish it even all over and I'm out don't cut my hair any lower.

Does your hair matter more to you than your appearance?

Me: YES!

So another more experienced barber is like "I'll finish you up just sit down I got you"
So I sit down and I'm just thinking how fucked my hair is and my weekend is gonna be, it just offsets my whole demeanor so I get my stuff and walk out thinking I'll just be doo ragging it up and using black beeswax to cover it up. Until my boy tells me how bad it looks...
"You know what it looks like?
Me: What
Like you need to get your head cut of hahahaha"

So now I'm sitting here stuck with a little boy/back to school haircut the cut your mom takes you to get when school starts after she lets your hair grow out all summer and since she doesn't have too much money to be running you back to the barber shop, she tells the barber to cut it "low but not too low"

When it's all said and done I go to work and arychtexas sees me and I take off my hat the jokes start flying..


e.jay said...

Damn, that's messed up. I know a thing or two about bad haircuts myself. Only thing is, I can't cover it up with a fitted and go on like business as usual, so be grateful for that lol...ARE THOSE YOUR SNEAKS IN YOUR BANNER? They are so hot! I need those high tops w/ the red inside, like right now!

hb said...

wow. why didn't you say something after the first "scoop" lol. hmm. does your hair grow fast?

Anonymous said...

This Is Why I Have A Specific Barber That I Go To.

You Cant Just Have Anyone Cut Your Hair.. The End Results Can Be Devastating.

kmX said...

At first I started laughing...but this shit is NO JOKE. Not like I know anything about haircuts but I know how it is for someone to fck up your hair. I be wantin to strangle bzxtchess...smh.

But anyway, just keep a hat on til it grows out [i hope your hair grows fast] and take this as a lesson learned...never let just ANYONE give you a cut. No matter how minor.

Video Vix[o]n said...

when i used to get cuts at my old barber, I'd go to the oldest guy in the spot and he'd cut my hair stupid. hairline looked like the stock graph line going up. horrible mess.

now i stick to my one and only barber. bad cuts aint no joke, ironically everybody's laughing.

Related Posts with Thumbnails
visitor web stats