Let Go

I was wearing my favorite shirt as worn by 'the karrie b'.....

I honestly don't wear it for social reform or to support the 'positive contributions of illegal immigrants in the United States' I just like the shirt because I think it's cool. But at the same time I'm very well versed on immigration reform and the whole social dynamics of it. I was just leaving the YMCA when this older white lady stopped me and said to me "what does your shirt mean?"

I told her and then she went on to ask me if I believed it was fair for immigrants who did things the right way, or families who lost jobs to an immigrant. Now that 'fair' and 'american jobs shit' really pisses me off like no other! So I told her in the scheme of things globally with many many human rights violations going on right now; is that really a major concern. We went from talking about immigrants, to the war on terror, to wome being abused under the cruelty of Islam, (another very touchy subject for me, cause how is your white surburbanite ass gonna tell me that you going over there 'and converting the heathens' is gonna make their situation better?) and finally to God. She proceeded to tell me how her marriage was on the rocks due to all sorts of stuff, and how she used to be out there and found peace in God.

When some people talk about their faith, I can feel the conviction in their body language and it makes me feel a certain way inside.... like I should really just stop sinning and planning to commit sins, ask for forgiveness and dedicate my life to the Lord. Normally the feeling last about an hour after I have been around the person with whom I had the conversation with but now I'm very conscious of what I do. I mean I don't do alot of bad things per se, I actually walk the razorblade. But sometimes my intentions aren't always the best.

She asked me why couldn't I let things go... as far as the sins I was holding onto, why I couldn't do without them? I didn't have an answer for her.

On a whole other note I recently came in to about $9,000 and I haven't really fucked it up like I want too, I'm actually kind of scared too. My birthday is 5 days away and I don't really wanna do shit!

Saving my soul pt.2

I started the quest for redmemption. I went to the humane society and helped out and I have to say.... I feel the same.

First off the day was pretty shitty, rainy and grey. So I got there and the chick was like...

"do you need a sars mask?"

Me: *silly woman* Nah, I'm a man...

I walked in the kennel and I was just like zaaammn! I mean I'm a dog owner and I've smelled shit and other doggy smells, but the smell of like 20+ dogs in a enclosed space is like a rotten big bacon classic!

But after cleaning the first couple of cages I was still a lil' freaked out by all the shit and stuff.

The cats kinda fucked me up too, I mean they didn't smell bad in comparison to the dogs but every one was so keut. I mean I never really was that big of a cat person but I've met some cool cats in my life (frankenstien,hobbes,kellog)and I have a special spot for them. I wanted to play with them but you couldn't cause of the risk of spreading a fatal eye infection.

So onto dog walking I was assigned and here were the luck ones I got....

This was the first dog I walked, it was hella sad because I guess he was so abused or whatever that he was super scary. I mean I'd go to pat his head and he'd brace himself for a punch or rollover expecting a kick!

This muthafucka was just happy to be out and run around...also kinda scary but we did run and plaaaay. He was mangy but still swheat.
This dog had the attitude of a hooker. He was so indifferent to me, I really felt like a john walking him. But he was pretty cool and laid back.
This mufucka here Carson... I loved this fuckin dog! His back was what had me, he was built like a fuckin tank! Stout, fast and single minded. He reminded me of Ashley's pit bull. I locked us in a little league baseball field and unleashed him. I let him chase me and I juked the shit outta his ass. But it's crazy how he could be playin' but nipping the shit outta me. His hops were crazy too, he would jump up and bite my nipple!
The picture does this big ass dog no justice. He had a cage all the way at the end, and as I got him out I thought of Green Mile as he walked down the rows of cages. But this mufucka was so laid back and chill, like he was high or something. He just enjoyed the walk like he was on death row!