(so that's) What Happened

Some things are funny as hell. Getting hit in the nuts, taking a snowball to the face and even tripping and falling. Except when it happens to you.
This morning one of those “funny’ moments occurred. Oh yeah it’s funny as hell but the joke is on me!

Now that the initial shock of my actions has worn off and iom now in the acceptance stage, I'm ready to go in depth into my folly... It's crazy that my success' are just as dramatic as my shortcomings, and they all stem from the fact that "I think I'm smarter than the average joe rat" which is kinda true. So anyways yesterday was my duty day which means I have to stay on my ship from 7am to 7am the next day, you're really kinda on stuck as far as leaving unless you get permission. So basically after I stood my four hours of watch from 7:30 to 11:30 am, I was hungry as fuck. So I'm on my way to Rally's when I pass a Popeye's and for some reason, I choose popeye's to order food from but I go inside to piss... as I walk in I see a white guy in the corner who looks like the guy I work for and in charge of my duty section.
I say to myself as I walk in "It would be funny as hell if that was Viano!" (the guy I work for) So as I do a double take at the guy, I see it really is him with his wife and children, and he smiles a humorless smile, and just says
"leave."

So I get back in my car and I'm all flucked up for reals, 1st off I'm kinda buckin duty by going to get food
2nd I'm in the wrong uniform to be out in town with.
3rd I'm no stranger to bending the rules.. I can't think of how ironic that was though, of all the places to go, and I had my heart set on Rally's, but something at popeye's called my name... and that something was trouble!

So after I got back I was in like limbo cause I didn't really know what was gonna happen and I still don't.. I'd rather just know one way or the other! I just hope it doesn't stop me from going to Atlanta on monday, because I've got international aspirations during my lil mini vacation.

Trouble Man

I hate being in a situation where I know I'm in trouble. I mean trouble feels like it just sits in the pit of my stomach for reals. And it's like I'll go through the day wondering how I'd be reacting to certain situations if I wasn't in trouble. Like I can laugh at a funny joke and smile and all that, something might happen to make me feel good and I'll feel good for a moment but in the back of my mind.. It'll always be there reminding me of what happened.
To make a long story short, I left last night when I wasn't supposed to leave and while I was gone someone was looking for me, and this morning I got confronted with it and I tried to hit em with the nut role, but I got it flipped on me. So now I'm getting talked to by a woman who has looked out for me and is very maternal in her mannerisms and doesn't swear and has looked out for me before. I mean I'd rather she'd yell than just talk you know? But again I'm in a situation where I have to explain my actions, and even though I've got no room to be angry at anyone but myself, it is frustrating being asked questions like "What were you thinking?" "Do you even care ?" and the follow up to that which had me scratching my brain "Why do you care?" and she kept repeating that "I just want to know why do you care?" and I don't know what to say to that at all. I mean what the fuck do you say to that?